I’ve wanted one of the dildos from Doc Johnson’s Super Hung Heroes collection for years, and finally, finally one is mine.
Long story short, back in 2013, Doc Johnson made a collection of ‘totally not superhero’ dildos, and I’m pretty sure they’ve since been discontinued, because I could only find them for sale online for high prices from sellers I wasn’t sure were trustworthy. I’ve since seen a few reputable shops selling them, but at prices I couldn’t justify for the novelty. I gave up hope of ever owning one. But by pure, sheer luck, I found one. In the sale section of Fifty and Dean, one of my favourite brick and mortar sex shops. For £20.
The dildo in question is the ‘Rock Hard Man’, and I know sex toy reviewers aren’t supposed to personalise toys, but in this case I can’t help it. It’s a dildo shaped like one of the Iron Man suits. And I am a terrible, terrible geek and both have a crush on Tony Stark and find the suits themselves super interesting. And hot.
I normally never talk about packaging, because unless I find it irritating or ugly, I don’t think about it much at all. But in this case, the packaging is worth commenting on. It’s loud and brash and runs with the comics theme. I won’t keep it, because I pretty much never keep my toys in their original boxes, but for a second I thought about it.
The Rock Hard Man is made from silicone, so I feel slightly less guilty about giving money to Doc Johnson, given their history with questionable materials. This is worth noting, and I’d recommend to read Dangerous Lilly’s post here, which discusses some of the issues with them as a manufacturer.
The Rock Hard Man has a straight shaft, and does not have a flared base, making it safe for vaginal penetration only. Measuring around 8 inches in length, it has an insertable length of 6.5 inches and a girth of 6 inches at its widest. It’s a beautiful dildo. The phallic nature of the shape is more obvious from some angles, but for the most part, it looks like a rendition of one of the suits. The silicone is a glossy and shiny metallic gold, and the glossy silicone means that with lube, sliding it into me is pretty easy.
For the Rock Hard Man, texture is king. I’m honestly not normally a texture person, but because the texture of the Rock Hard Man isn’t incredibly defined and has very smooth edges, it’s actually not too intense. The texture isn’t mild by any means, but it isn’t intense either.
I do have one specific point of contention in terms of texture, and that is the arc reactor. It took me three attempts to actually get the Rock Hard Man inside of me fully, and that was due to the arc reactor refusing to go in. I did eventually solve this problem with applications of vast amounts of lube, but it was still annoying as shit.
For me, the most enjoyable aspect of the Rock Hard Man was size. It’s a chunky dildo, and I have taken larger toys, but the girth of the dildo really is the selling point for me. The coronal ridge feels really great when it just enters me, but the way this leads up to the wider girth of the dildo’s body feels even better. Generally, I find it easier to orgasm from my dick being touched with something inside me, so using it in combination with a wand- or even just hand stimulation- on my dick is really enjoyable.
I think the Rock Hard Man has become my favourite dildo for frottage, and that was something I did not expect at all. The arc reactor is really good for this, so I can forgive its existence when it comes to penetration. There’s one particular spot on the back of the head, right above where the coronal ridge starts that has a sort of segmented pattern. This part is what I find most useful for frottage, but I also enjoy using the dip underneath the ‘chin’. I was concerned when I bought the Rock Hard Man that I was making a mistake in buying a vaginal only dildo, especially when I have issues with vaginal penetration due to dysphoria, and my vagina’s days are numbered as it is, but the Rock Hard Man’s usefulness for frottage makes it well worth it for me. The firmness of the silicone is perfect- hard enough to be satisfying to grind against, but soft enough that even at its most sensitive, my cock doesn’t feel like it’s been rubbed raw. I know there’ll never be a dildo made for frottage, but if there ever was, the Rock Hard Man would be damn close.
I do really really wish the Rock Hard Man had a flared based, at least so I could feel less conflicted about buying it, given my vagina is on death row. I actually find taking girth easier in my ass than in my cunt, so I’d probably end up using it for penetration more if it was anal safe. Also, I know that it would make the form slightly less streamlined, but if the Rock Hard Man was harness compatible, I would die and ascend to heaven.
I’ve already complained about the arc reactor, but your milage may vary when it comes to this. One of my partners said he actually really enjoyed feeling it just inside his vagina, so its obviously got something going for it for some people. Just not me.
Overall, I really enjoy using this toy. The frottage is actually my favourite thing about it, and I know I’ve already sung praises to it, but it really is something. I don’t know how well frottage would work for cis women, or transmasc/NB AFAB people who haven’t had HRT driven growth, and I can’t speak for that at all.
Honestly, I would not have bought this dildo at full price, because the novelty isn’t enough, and I have an aversion to buying vaginal only toys. But for people for whom that limitation isn’t a problem, and who are looking for larger and/or textured toys, I’d absolutely recommend it.
This toy was purchased of my own free will, and I was not compensated in the form of cash or a free toy in return for a review.