The Oxballs Ergo is one of my favourite butt plugs. The silicone is the perfect amount of squish to make it feel comfortable but still substantial. While the Ergo size I chose does require a bit of warmup (and the squishiness of the silicone can make actually inserting it take a little more effort and force), it’s my favourite toy for long-term wear.
I’ve always wanted to try Oxball’s super soft squishy silicone in dildo form, which is why I’m super excited that SheVibe have started stocking the Oxballs Buddy, and were happy to send me one for review!
With a circumference that ranges between 6.5 and 5 inches, I can only describe the Oxballs Buddy as ‘chunky’. It’s relatively short, with just 5 inches of insertable length, but it’s still a hefty piece of silicone. The ‘smoke’ colour I got my Buddy in is a metallic grey, with glitter that catches the light at some angles.
While slightly simplified, the Oxballs Buddy is still a realistic shape, with a super defined ridge on the underside, a semi-defined head, small indent that resembles the urethral opening, and two low-hanging balls. I have to say I really love those balls specifically— often the balls on dildos are super round, symmetrical and perky, so the unevenly hanging and slightly lower balls on the Buddy really give it character. I’m a really big fan, even just visually.
Using Vaginally
I’m currently (at the time of writing) in a ‘no vaginal toys’ period following my hysterectomy, but I did manage to squeeze in some testing of the Oxballs Buddy in the week prior to surgery. I’ve already talked about how thick the Buddy is, but it bears repeating. It’s right on the limit of what my vagina can comfortably take in terms of thickness, so it’s a really great stretch.
I personally don’t mind toys that feel softer than actual erect penises (and actually particularly enjoy them). However, I’m aware this is a bit of a niche taste, so want to emphasise that while the Buddy is soft, it’s large and solid enough that it doesn’t feel flaccid. The softness here makes the size feel a little more comfortable, as does the lack of texture— there is that raised ridge (that resembles the corpus spongiosum) on the underside, but aside from this the Oxballs Buddy doesn’t have a huge amount of texture going on.
While the squishiness of Oxball’s soft silicone did make inserting the Ergo difficult when it came to anal play (I’ll talk about the Buddy in a moment), I didn’t find I had issues with vaginal use. While I definitely needed to relax into taking it, that was more to do with the size rather than an issue inserting too-soft silicone.
My type of play with dildos tends to be very ‘leave it in and clench down on it’ rather than thrusting, so I can’t comment too much on thrusting the Buddy. However, I did try out grabbing those balls to try and use them for thrusting leverage, and it works really well! Another way I’ve found I like to use them for vaginal play is to sitting upright with the Buddy inside me and grinding onto the balls. They — like the rest of the Buddy — aren’t very textured, so the sensation isn’t as intense as my dedicated grinding toys would be, but it’s still a fun way to play.
Using Anally
I was expecting a pretty similar experience with the Oxballs Buddy that I have with my Ergo, and I was pretty much right on the money. Getting the Buddy inside my butt is a challenge— as well as being chunky and having very little taper, the squishiness of the silicone means that the force I apply pushing doesn’t necessarily get transferred into actually pushing it into me. It bends relatively often, in a way that’s often very frustrating. As with the Ergo, I have to stretch my butt larger than the Buddy to be able to easily insert it.
Once it’s actually in though? Heaven. The lack of texture and targeted stimulation isn’t suited to everyone, but my interest in penetration at all is primarily a feeling of fullness, so it’s perfect. The Buddy is big and beefy and stays feeling that way even with the slight give of the silicone. I actually find it to be better than the Ergo for feeling ‘full’ while masturbating. The Ergo has a tendency to shoot out my butt when I orgasm, but the longer size of the Buddy means that even though there is some shift when I come, I still have something chunky in my butt after the toy pushes out a bit.
Harnessing the Oxballs Buddy
So I normally don’t really like wearing dildos with balls in a harness. This is for a couple of reasons. Firstly, a lot of dildos that have balls also have suction cups, which I find to be uncomfortable and poke-y. Secondly, the balls are normally where I place the o-ring of the harness anyway, so don’t do anything visually (especially with my normal go-to harness).
However, the Oxballs Buddy is one of two dildos (the other being the Vulpini Design Taro) where I actually quite like having the balls! I’ve thought about why this is, and I have a couple of theories why these two dildos in particular work for me.
Firstly, the balls on both dildos are the base of the dildo — I don’t need to also figure out placement in relation to a suction cup. I also think the shape of the balls is a huge factor here. Both the Taro and Buddy have quite long balls, especially compared to the perky round ones that I see on most dildos. This means the o-ring sits better around the base of the dildo, making the whole thing less unwieldy. When harnessed, these balls cup a bit more to the shape of my body. As a side effect of this and the larger and flatter base, this cupping also means I get some great pressure out of wearing/using these toys.
The thing that pushes the Buddy above the Taro for harnessed use though is that it’s simply compatible with a wider range of harnesses. The Taro is pretty much limited to my Sh! Classic Strap-On harness, while I’ve also been able to wear the Buddy in my SpareParts Joque.
Overall
The Oxballs Buddy is a challenge, but one that’s totally worth facing up to. I keep coming back to those balls, but they are a feature I genuinely love, and I’d like to see more toys with a similar design. While the soft silicone meant that the Buddy had some of the issues I expected from my experience with the Ergo — such as needing to stretch out first, and anal insertion sometimes being a bit of a struggle — it also avoids some of the shortcomings I found the plug to have, such as shooting out when I orgasmed with it inserted.
The large size means it’s definitely not going to be the right toy for a lot of people (I’d love for Oxballs to make a few sizes of it), but for those who know they want a chunky toy, I’d really recommend it! It’s also great for harness play, so I’d especially recommend it to people whose interests lie in the Venn diagram of ‘thick toys’ and ‘strap-on sex’.
Buy the Oxballs Buddy from SheVibe for $69
This product was sent to me by SheVibe, in return for a fair and impartial review. Affiliate links were used in this post.
