Around this time last year, I wrote a big Strap-Ons 101 post. While I’m still proud of that article, I realise I didn’t touch on “strapless” or ‘double ended’ strap-ons much, as at the time I had very limited experience with them. Because of that, I’d like to discuss these toys in more detail in this blog post, giving an overview of some of their advantages and disadvantages, as well as how to choose both a strapless/double ended toy and—in some cases—a harness to go with it.
What is a “Strapless” Strap-On?
First things first, what is a strapless dildo? Sometimes also known as double-ended strap-ons (which is my preferred terminology—I’ll get to explaining why later in this post), these toys don’t just have a normal shaft like a dildo, but also include a shaft (sometimes called a ‘pony’) that’s worn internally by the top. In principle, instead of the toy being held to the body by the straps of a harness, it’s held in place by the wearer’s kegel muscles (sometimes also called the PC muscles or pelvic floor muscles). This does mean that unlike conventional strap-ons—which are anatomy neutral—double ended strap-ons can only be used by tops who have vaginas, although they can still be used for penetrative oral, anal, or vaginal sex.
Do Strapless Strap-ons Work?
The first question I always get asked when I introduce the concept of strapless strap-ons to somebody in real life is ‘do they work?’. And the honest answer to that is, most of the time no, or least not in the way that their marketing implies. While some people are able to use them that way—with no harness, thrusting away, and able to keep it inside them—this isn’t the case for a lot of people, myself included. Why is this?
The first is that the PC muscles aren’t the only muscles involved in topping with a double-ended strap-on, at least most of the time. With strong kegel muscles, it’s very possible to lie back wearing a double-ended strap harness-free and have your partner ride you. (Hell, it’s even possible with kegel muscles that aren’t strong, which is why I’ve been able to do it.) But things get a lot more complicated with more active topping, because topping uses a lot of muscles that don’t see much use in everyday life (one day I will make a strap-on work out program I swear), making it an overall more difficult experience, especially for people new to topping. Another is that the wetter a top gets while wearing a double-ended strap-on, the more likely the toy is to slip out. This is especially a risk for anal sex, as the anal sphincter muscles are so much stronger.
That doesn’t mean that double-ended strap-ons are useless, however, and does lead us on to the reason why I call them double-ended rather than ‘strapless’. The key to strapless strap-ons… is to wear them in a harness by default.
Why Would You Wear A Strapless with a Harness?
Given a lot of the marketing around double strap-ons is the fact they’re meant to work without a harness, what’s the point of wearing one in a harness? Well, the other main feature of double strap-ons still applies— they give tactile feedback and sensation. While toys that modify the base of traditional dildos so that they give some kind of stimulation do exist, the inserted shaft of a double strap-on is the only way to do this via g-spot stimulation, and can provide much more detailed and subtle feedback. And for those of us who need external or clitoral stimulation to come, models with inbuilt vibrators—like the very rumbly Eve’s Vibrating Strapless Strap-On pictured in this post—can bring us to orgasm when topping. This can be something really valuable for some (although not all! Everyone is different) transmasculine people, who may experience dysphoria from being unable to orgasm while topping.
How Do I Choose a Harness for Double-Ended Strap-Ons?
So if the trick is to wear a double-ended strap-on with a harness, how do you choose a harness that’ll work? I wrote about harness styles in my past Strap-Ons 101 post, and all three ‘styles’ of harness I discuss in that post are compatible with double-ended strap-ons, so long as there either is no panel between the wearer and the o-ring holding the toy in place, or this panel can be moved out of the way.
There is a slight trade off with security when it comes to harnesses with double-ended strap-ons though. The more secure a double is attached to the body, the less movement it can make. While this is ideal in terms of aiding keeping the toy in, it also means that internal shaft is less able to move, providing less intense g-spot orgasms. While I’m generally a big fan of two-strap style harnesses, double strap-ons are a time where one-strap or underwear style harnesses have their benefits. Because they don’t hold the toy so firmly in place, in some cases they can allow for more free movement of the toy and easier g-spot stimulation.
Conventional Strap-Ons Vs Double-Ended/“Strapless” Strap-Ons
So tl;dr, what are the advantages and disadvantages of the two types of strap-on?
Conventional Strap-Ons:
• Offer a wider variety of shapes and sizes than double-ended strap-ons
• Don’t provide tactile feedback without the use of additional toys, and even then don’t stimulate the g-spot
• Can feel less ‘natural’ for some people
Double-Ended/“Strapless”:
• Provide more tactile feedback than conventional strap-ons
• Can be difficult to use in a truly ‘strapless’ way outside of particular positions, especially for anal sex, as the anal sphincter muscles are tighter than the vagina
• Less freedom with shapes and sizes because there are less products on the market. It can also be hard to find a double that’s the right size for both partners
This post was sponsored by Adam & Eve, who sent me the Eve’s Vibrating Strapless Strap-On pictured in this article. Get 50% off almost any 1 adult item & FREE US/CAN shipping by using offer code KELVIN at AdamAndEve.com. 18+ Only.
This is a super informative and well-written post!
Ngl, I’m surprised that strap-on workout programs aren’t a thing yet. Even though it’s kind of niche, I could definitely benefit from something like that!