Review: Ouch! Old School Tattoo Style Printed Paddle

I adore old school tattoo art. I’m not really into vintage aesthetics in general, but tattoos and kink aesthetics are my big exceptions. While all of the tattoos on my body are blackwork, I have a huge soft spot for American traditional tattoo styles, so when Betty’s Toy Box asked me if I wanted to review anything from the Ouch! Old School Tattoo Style line, I was really excited! It’s part of a whole line of old fashioned tattoo inspired BDSM gear. This line includes wrist and ankle cuffs (including some with a handle), a paddle, a ball gag, a collar and leash, and an eye mask, all printed with various Sailor Jerry-esque designs (like anchors, swallows, cherries, daggers, lady’s heads, and horseshoes) and all at very affordable price points—all items are <$30 and more than half are less than $20.

The toy I asked to review is the Ouch! Old School Tattoo Style Printed Paddle, which is available for $21.99. Made of bonded leather, it has a total length of 28.3 cm. Each side of the paddle is shaped slightly differently, with one being totally flat and the other having a slight curve to it. Between the two layers of the paddle, there’s what feels like a wooden dowel or rod, and this is what shapes the curved side.

What is Bonded Leather?

So I mentioned that the Ouch! Old School Tattoo Style Printed Paddle is made of bonded leather. But what does this actually mean? One day I’ll write a ‘leather terms for kinksters 101’ type post, but in the meantime, the quick answer is that bonded leather is a mix of real and fake leather. It uses the leftover scraps and fibres from the processing of leather, mixing them with a polyurethane binder. After this, the mix of fibres is rolled together using adhesives onto a backing. In some cases, the bonded leather is then embossed, so that it has a texture similar to natural leather grain, although the actual ‘face’ of the surface actually is entirely vinyl or polyurethane.

So what are the pros of bonded leather? Well, it’s cheaper than other kinds of leather products. While the ‘face’ of the material isn’t leather, it still has the smell of leather—I’m a leather fetishist and the smell of leather is a big part of it for me, so it’s important that the Old School Tattoo Paddle ‘smells right’ to me. Bonded leather has a smoother, more consistent texture than other leathers.

That’s not to say there aren’t downsides though. Bonded leather doesn’t have as long a lifespan as other leathers, can have its colours fade in sunlight, can scratch, peel, and flake more easily, and can be harder to clean, as some cleaners are abrasive and strip away the leather. And while the amount of real leather in bonded leather does vary—in some cases it can be as low as 10%—, it does mean that bonded leather isn’t vegan.

Paddle Quality and Aesthetics

As I said earlier, I love vintage tattoo designs, and I love them on the Ouch! Old School Tattoo Style Printed Paddle! They’re very American-traditional in design— think Sailor Jerry, thick bold lines, limited colours.

While the pattern is one repeating pattern, the way the print was applied to the paddle I received makes the two sides of the paddle look like they have slightly different prints. They don’t actually—you can see the edges of a couple of design elements that I thought were only on the rounded side on the flat side (like the winged skull and blue anchors) and vice versa. The print is a lot smaller on the actual paddle I received than it was in the product images on Betty’s Toy Box, and there are some differences in the print. For example, there’s a swallow holding a love letter in the design. In the product photos online, this letter has no colour aside from the lines and the heart, while on the actual paddle the letter is white.

I’m not sure if this is due to product photos being taken of an earlier prototype or version, but it is something worth noting. I do think I personally prefer the print as it is on the actual paddle to the product photos, but the incongruence is definitely odd. There are also a couple of design elements to the print I don’t think quite work—there’s a traditional tattoo style ‘lady’s head’, but because the person’s hair is black, they look a bit like a weirdly shaped head with a hat floating above it.

There’s a few spots of rough stitching on the Ouch! Old School Tattoo Style Printed Paddle, but for the most part it’s neat and even. I do want to draw attention to the fact that the bonded leather has chipped around a couple of stitching lines though. This does make me worry a little bit about the longevity of the paddle, especially if it’s used for rougher play.

The Old School Tattoo Style Printed Paddle In Use

Speaking of rougher play, how did the Ouch! Old School Tattoo Style Printed Paddle hold up in actual use? Because of the piece of wood between the two layers of the paddle, I’d actually say it feels like a very thick cane. I can feel some kind of difference between the flat and rounded sides of the paddle if I concentrate—the rounded side feels more like a cane, while the flatter side has a thicker layer that disguises the piece of wood in the middle, making it feel more like a paddle—but the difference is pretty minimal. There’s differences in the sensations, but I wouldn’t say that they’re different sensations, if that makes sense.

It’s definitely stingier rather than thuddy, which again makes it feel a lot more like a cane than a paddle. I think it doesn’t help that there isn’t a huge amount (if any) padding between the two layers other than the piece of wood, which means it bends in use. I do actually quite enjoy light stingy impact play, so I’ve still enjoyed playing with the Ouch! Old School Tattoo Style Printed Paddle, but I’d probably look towards spanking rulers or canes for this kind of sensation, not a paddle.

When it comes to the bending, there’s been a few times where I’ve asked my partner to switch out spanking implements, as I’m worried about that piece of wood snapping. I’m not a heavy bottom at all, so I wouldn’t say it’s a case of the the Ouch! Old School Tattoo Style Printed Paddle being unsuited for heavy play, but more a case of it being only suited to very light play.

Overall

I love the aesthetics of the Ouch! Old School Tattoo Style Printed Paddle, but it didn’t work for me practically. I am actually alright with the use of bonded leather rather than genuine leather—especially as it means the paddle still has that leather smell that I adore so much—and it’s the lack of padding between the paddle layers that’s the dealbreaker for me. I was too worried about the paddle breaking in any kind of use that wasn’t very light to be able to recommend it.

While I can’t vouch for it myself, Queer Earthling (a great blogger you should follow) vouches for the Fetish Fantasy Rubber Paddle, if you’re looking for beginner friendly paddles at a similar/lower price point to the Old School Tattoo Paddle.

The Ouch! Old School Tattoo Style Printed Paddle is available from from Betty’s Toy Box for $21.99