The month or so leading up to Valentine’s Day is the time of year I get the most questions about sex toy recommendations. While I’m happy to give more personalised advice, this year I wanted to also give some general recommendations in the form of a gift guide.
I will caveat this by saying that every body is different and we all like different things when it comes to sex and sexuality. Some of the items in this guide may not work for you, and that’s ok! That said, they are all genuine recommendations, and I hope this gift guide inspires you!
Just Exploring
The nature of Valentines day can make it feel like the ideal time to start testing the waters with introducing toys into your sex life. Regardless of if this is partnered or solo, some advice I’d give is to take things slow and to give yourself grace. Your first time exploring anything in the bedroom is unlikely to be the perfect scenario you might imagine in your head, but that doesn’t mean it’s not going to be fun in its own way!
The Fun Factory Volta is one of my favourite vibrators, and one of the most versatile I own. Adaptable to a ton of different body shapes and sizes, the Volta’s fluttering tips can be used on clitorises, penises, nipples, and pretty much any other part of your body that you find pleasant to touch. The only limits here are your imagination and that it’s an external vibe (it’s not safer to insert into the anus and you’re not likely to get anything from inserting it vaginally).
The Lovehoney Unisex Strap-On Harness Briefs are not my favourite or the best strap-on harness I own, but they are the one I’d recommend to newbies the most. While not suitable for ‘strapless’ strap-ons (which are not as strapless as they’re marketed to be, fyi), they are a comfortable, affordable, and easily approachable choice for people who are new to strap-on sex.
Looking to explore BDSM? It’s a little more expensive than some riding crop options out there (if price is really a factor, check out the Hot Octopuss riding crop), but I really recommend the Liebe Seele Angel’s Kiss Mini Riding Crop. The mini size means it’s easy to travel with, the heart shape is super cute and seasonal, and the thick leather tip means it’s can be used for more thuddy sensation, so it’ll be one you still use if you want to dive a little deeper.
And finally, if you have been anywhere on the sex toy side of the internet in the past few years, you’re aware of ‘The Rose Toy’. There actually isn’t just one Rose Toy, and there’s some I wouldn’t recommend. However, the BestVibe Rose is really solid, and was well deserving in its #3 spot on my Top Ten Of 2023 list. The size is very friendly to people with larger than average anatomy, so it’s one I’d particularly recommend for trans people on testosterone HRT.
The Connoisseur
So you’ve been exploring sex toys for a while, you have a pretty solid idea of what works for you, and you’re looking to splash out on something special. Have I got the recommendations for you!
I recently reviewed the Womanizer Next, and it is absolutely the best air pulsation toy I’ve ever tried. While it comes with a premium price tag, it’s really well constructed, allows for a ton of control (and without needing an app — something more companies should take note of), and has really great feeling air pulsation.
If you’re looking for a rumbly wand, the Doxy Die Cast 3 is a new favourite of mine. While I think the OG size Doxy works slightly better for some kinds of sex — particularly scissoring — as it requires less particular positioning, the Die Cast 3 has won me over in general.
Vixen Creations has had a fantastic reputation for years, and after managing to get my hands on a VixSkin Mustang last year, I can say that reputation was not exaggerated. Their VixSkin dual-density silicone feels fantastic, and is available in a wide range of shapes, sizes, and colours (although they do lean towards the realistic).
And finally, haven’t been able to find what you want on the market? Canadian company Freely Toys has a toy builder, allowing you to customise your perfect toy from one of their templates.
Flying Solo
I’m a big proponent of treating yourself on Valentine Day! Whether you’re single or in a relationship, it can be super valuable to take some time for yourself.
PinkLabel TV is the first place I suggest to my friends when they ask for porn recommendations. Hosting a wide range of indie adult and erotic films, they have vintage, modern, documentary, educational, vanilla, and kinky content, across a range of genders and sexualities. Two recs from me: the 90s leathedyke documentary BloodSisters, and Sweet Sweet Kink: A Collection of BDSM Stories, which is exactly what it says on the tin.
Something I really recommend for getting in touch with your body is solo rope. Even if you’re not into bondage as a BDSM thing, the act of self-tying is really meditative and has helped me a ton with feeling more present. If you’re looking for floor tying only, I’d recommend the bamboo rope from Reborn Ropes. For newbies looking for guides, check out the book Shibari You Can Use, and of course do not forget safety/EMT shears, even playing solo.
If you’re looking to really treat yourself, Fun Factory are offering an anti-Valentines bundle, with a price tag of $214 and a value of up to $395. Toys included in this offer I’d recommend include the Fun Factory Volta, Bootie, and Amor, as well as the SpareParts Joque, Liberator Wedge, and Sutil Rich Lube.
And finally, if you’re looking for a cosy night in, how about a book? Shameless Sex: Choose Your Own Pleasure Path to Unlock the Sex Life You’ve Been Waiting For isn’t a solo-only or solo-focused book (there’s plenty about long-term relationships), but I think when you’re single is the ideal time to work through the messaging society gives us about sex and sexuality and untangling what you enjoy and want from sex.
Gift Cards
Lastly, one of my biggest recommendations when it comes to sex toy gift giving is always gift cards! Because tastes when it comes to sex toys are so varied, it can be a safer bet to let the person who’ll end up using the toy pick themselves one.
Digital giftcards also mean you don’t have to worry about shipping time, so if you’re running late on time they’re a good bet. You can even make a date night of the actual picking out of toys together, whether that’s in person or online.
Get vouchers from: Sh! Women’s Store / Fun Factory / Good Vibes / SheVibe (US Only) / Freely Toys
This blog post was not sponsored, and I was not compensated to include or promote any products. Some links are affiliate links.
